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A Life-Changing Event

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January 2005 Message : A Life Changing Event
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Ken - Since I suddenly feel the need to correspond.. it is your report on your experience with cancer which prompts this correspondence. I was diagnosed with breast cancer and after coming across an alternative called: Poly-MVA (see: http://www.PolyMvaSurvivors.com) I decided to put off any "traditional" treatment. My 20 years of pilgrimage in Asia had already prepared me for death, so I was not trying to "put off" death but to put off useless suffering. Yet, the idea of being dependent on a physical product forever pushed me into making a decision which surprised me greatly since I consider myself naturopathic... I had a bilateral mastectomy last month. In fact, I don't really know why I did it since recovery is MUCH HARDER than I expected & the results of the biopsy showed that I could have survived 20 years with no problem on the alternative therapy!

But I rellize now that it is your (constant) insistence on the importance of ONENESS which explains my underlying motive... and again I claim that you are the ONLY Western Teacher whom I have come across giving the SAME Teaching that I have gleaned from my studies in the East. please accept my BEST wishes for a long life in order to continue your vital work. With sincerity - (OH-USA)
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I did read your letter re cancer. To respond to the idea of my thoughts...and it may not be what you are asking. First, it seems I just looked at it. Then I looked at it with the idea of you carrying the energy... like most people, but with all the other context that you understand. Then I decided that it has a particularly special connection with the amount of attention place on it and the flavour...push/pull, yes/no, very elemental or basic connection with awareness. That special life thru death flavour that it has. And the simmering/seething feel to it, the rolling blackness of it ...sorta the antithesis of life and light. Looking at it from your location, of course the immediacy of the situation. The occurences of reality that effected/affected you and your family...their responses and the "reality" or "unreality" each whacking the various people and relationships. And then the personal issue with yourself and your choice of directions in life, personal and larger.

One of the things that I suspect we do for each other on this planet is to be "triggers" to change the bubble of reality that we wrap ourselves in, and, your story did that. I suspect that is what some beings are here for... is to "be" triggers. Not for deciding what someone should do, and basically not involved in the direction or results, only the triggering. And you seem to want to learn the playing field...perhaps before you allow the teams to go out and play. A catalyst doesnt itself change, it just initiates an action in other things. I suspect that it is the material universes' method to do the same, create change, and in the life energy game, there are the same catalysts, to create change. I just like to call them triggers....and to be a trigger it takes a strange combination of interest/disinterest and involvement/not involved, lack
of attention on the "group" reality bubble...that has to do with subjective reality options. Thats what you do, and, in a way, I would be surprized if what occured HAD NOT come knockin a your door. Your response, of course, was the test run. That "test" shift that you worked on.... (J.W., Bali)
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I am today writing and from within my gratitude for the place I find that we are kindred. Many thanks to you for relating your journey into the darkness, and your experience of facing the fears and negative forces that were attendant to your discovery that cancer was in your body. From a deep and timeless place within, I acknowledge your courage and steadfastness in the face of the unknown, and your willingness to fully experience what was being revealed to you. I began exploring the mysteries and experiencing the Oneness and so was drawn peripherally into your orbit for the past few years when I first came upon your newsletter and began sporadically reading bits and pieces of various editions. In reading A Life Changing Event, I began to reflect on my own experience and awareness of the Oneness and the importance of the call to embrace the Dark Side as part of transmuting and balancing the energies. ...So just know that I am hearing you, and wishing you peace and godspeed in your work. Namaste (M.- USA)
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Thank you for sharing your story. I have always been most appreciative of all your experiences that you have so openly shared. My own world view is so narrow. Your writings challenge me to continuously look at similar areas in my life and see how I feel. You have contributed so much to my spiritual growth since I attended your training. Thank you. With deepest respect and gratitude (S.K. USA)
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Thank you for your openness and sharing your cancer story. My beloved mother died of cancer when I was 14. My father has survived cancer and my father-in-law has been in cancer treatment for about a year.I am printing out the article and sending it my husband's father, as he does not have a computer. I particularly liked your method of asking your cancer to stay still rather than rage war. I remember During my training with you, the video of the Chinese cancer hospital. We all literally watched the tumor shrink on video as they said something like "Wasan" which I think meant "it is done." I continually thank God for your wisdom and your courage to share so candidly with your students and other travelers. I too have witnessed our "community" jump on those recently diagnosed with various dis-ease and suggest treatments without asking the person what they would like to do first. Thank you for reminding me how important this is. (JKC-USA)
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Just read your letter of shift and survival....embracing and love... thank-you...for sharing your cancer story from an enegetic perspective. It can be very interesting to be 'sick' within the metaphysical community huh? I have been working with an energy within my body for the last 4 years and it is rather strange. Perspective of families, friends and strangers, as well as the bigger strangers... myself and God. Which while on an intellectual level I hear and believe are one and the same, on a moment to moment basis feel like an illusion.... I want to know we are are the same, you know? Serious illness seems to make or break relationship, at least from my recent experience. And while I believe that we can relate to others through feelings perhaps, I, like you understand that on many levels we are just talking at each other. A relationship many years past taught me this. He used to say to me,'we can never really say I understand what you mean' because it is simply not true.... that was one gift of the relationship we had together. many many blessings..... (M, USA)
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Thank you for sharing such an intimate part of your life with me. It has been hard to also have family members who have died of cancer. If anything please look at the work that STEPHEN LEVINE and ONDREA LEVINE have done with cancer patients and the termanilly ill. They work with meditation and over the last 25 years have helped people through cancer or terminal illness or those that are coming to death face. They have helped thousands face the issues surrounding their 'holding' onto suffering, life, who they thought they were and help create a space for it all to unfold into the spaciousness of our own nature. I am sure that you will receive thousands of e-mails about this recent newsletter and hope that you can use this information since Stephen's work will really help those with cancer and the termanilly ill. Please pass this information on so that it may be of use to others around the world. Here is a link to a website that conveys some of his work http://www.thinkingallowed.com/levine.html Just want to wish you all the best for 2005 and thanks you for coming to Glastonbury. (C.G. UK)
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I should say that I had read your newsletter when you sent it but reread it in case I had missed something. Thanks for sharing your experience. The topic of cancer is a tricky one. Like any supposed termination of life contract, one could be left feeling that one had been fired or failed. In my view the acceptance of death is a requirement of life. As humans we fear death, simply because it is unknown, like the truth of our existence but as that truth becomes clear we can see how we must all "die before we die". To know ourselves in our timeless state, devoid of limiting beliefs, is surely in our best interests. I believe that a shock like a serious illness can cause one to turn and face that reality, which otherwise could be avoided for an entire lifetime or more. It would seem that the timing of your illness was similar to the timing of my experience. After going down the wrong path in with overwork and low self esteem I ended up very sick indeed. All my lymph glands were swollen and I had developed a nasty basel cell mutation to top off other stress related breakdowns.I ignored the basel cell mutation even though it was obviously not normal, my reasoning being that I was so sick that I was close to death anyway and should just stop. I had a three month break then returned to the workforce, but then to a new job. Slowly (very slowly) I started to appreciate the more simple things in life. After a year the glands were no longer swelling but I had acknowledged that the mutation was obviously cancerous and I should do something about it. My state of mind up until that point was that of minimal concern for the physcial problem and it's consequences as I was more focussed on emerging from the darkness that enveloped me. The lack of joy weighed more heavily on me. I always felt somewhat confident that any health problem could be resolved one way or another. That all changed the moment I went to get help. The doctor's fears made me doubt my own ability to heal and I found myself drawn into the medical practitioners limited view of physical man. At that stage I began to feel much more concern and my world became darker. I had the mutation removed but I found my mood over the following year more troubling than it had been the previous year. All this was happening as my parallel, more conscious life, was picking up steam. It's likely that I have not yet freed myself from the mindset, but if so, it has been demoted in importance compared to the benefits of self transformation.

I was in New Zealand, reflecting I guess. The energy there is all water (all water) and it is a good place for reflecting if one doesn't get caught up in the mass consciousness. Having been through so much change, and so many different spiritual experiences I was having difficulty relating to planet Earth and her inhabitants. I felt I was being drawn into other peoples projections of what I was. When one becomes a new, or very different, person, close relatives and friends have difficulty adjusting. I found myself dealing with issues of chosing between alienation or losing oneself out of compliance. So, to cut that story short I had three years of setting fear based goals that would manifest and bring me dissatissfaction, and in so doing help me realise that my true desires were paramount in importance. I also came up against my own weaknesses - all the issues that I'm dealing with in this life became more obvious, such as self esteem and security issues. I obtained a better understanding about the difference between deferment/removal of hought/energy and the transformation of such energy. As long as the root beliefs linger the energies will reaccumulate. The root beliefs can only be eliminated by being saturated in the awareness of one's true state of being. Comparing false with true. Confused with clear. Dark with light. Nearly all my energy was devoted to in depth understanding of my relationship to life. My thoughts, their motivations and their effect in my perceived/experienced reality. I also gained a good understanding of crystals, which I used to help me in my introspection. Around last September I felt that I understood what it was that I needed to understand in order to relate to the world. It is the understanding of how one is creating one's reality. Call it manifestation law or whatever. In it's simplicity, like attracts like. What one gives one's attention to affects one's vibration that attracts more of the same into one's experience. You get what you want when you allow it. It is in identifying how we are disallowing what we think we want that our true motivations are revealed. Everybody really does have what they want, no more and no less. To experience light one must be light. Everything is perception. Light is everywhere and it is up to us what we choose to perceive. The key is in the perception or attention. One night I lost my ego, all my false beliefs/perceptions, momentarily and I felt what it was like for the "real" me to be fully functioning in my physical body - and then my ego snapped back. The next night I was so focussed on removing "it", my ego, that "it" almost left and the force of the energy pulling out of me woke me up and physically rolled me over in the bed. Lot's of interesting stories to tell. My intent now is to saturate my mind with light leading to the disolution/transformation of ego. I have seen how that centre controls all other chakras - it is the puppeteer, the grand master blaster of illusion. To free one's mind is to free one's life. Yet I know now that one does not need an ego in order to function properly in this reality.

So now I am in London. A place where I lived years ago and swore that it was the worst place I ever lived - yet I am now back. When I first arrived I nearly imploded. Within a few weeks I was very sick, ending up on antibiotics. That experience jolted me into remembering that I was giving my attention to what was apparently wrong in my life rather than what was right. Perception. The purpose of being here for the time being is to master perception. To master perception requires a free mind. The perceived storehouse of negativity in the city environment and my extremely charged work environment (power, control, greed, fear) are pressing all my buttons yet I feel confident that light will prevail. I have given myself a year! Sometimes I feel weak and slip backwards but overall I feel confident of a successful outcome because I understand that I can have whatever I ask for - as long as I allow it. Every small thing that I appreciate, that I acknowledge as having been delivered in response to a previous request increases my expectation and propells me faster towards my goal. So that's the story so far. It's work in progress of course! (P. UK)
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The cure for cancer is in Eugene, Oregon. Check out aquarius water. Cancer cells are anaerobic, almost all pathogens are anaerobic. They need an acidic medium to proliferate. Raise the body PH, increase the bood oxygen and it backs it out of the system. There are other formulas created by a German Biophysicist. Be Well (JG, USA)
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I have 2 clients who have had the cancer label. Often when I work with them I think of you. When I sense a *cancer* energy, I don't battle it. Instead I try to find a place where everyone works in a less painful way. I admit that sometimes I do get abit authoritative about separating the energies to their own homes, just as one does when you come across 2 yr.olds fighting over something that they both could have if they just look around. I think that the acceptance that you seem to have achieved is very needed. At the same time, support of the body is also good. With the 2 clients, one was given a death sentence of 6 months - 4 years ago (he no longer has the tumors). The other walked out on chemotherapy and is regaining her vitality. They have recently started taking apple cider vinegar to encourage the akaline balance in the body. But then I just read that the way the body achieves that in when meeting something as strongly acid as vinegar, is to leach calcium from the bones. I don't know it that is true or not. Any thoughts on that would be appreciated. I understand about the anti-life energy that you have been relating with. I too felt that. I appreciated you writing about it. Thanks! (JC - Canada)
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Have just read your newsletter for the second time. I was shocked to read you had been dealing with Cancer, intense family issues magnified and created by it, while working flat out. I was just grateful to read in the same letter the positive results you have now about your health. Congratulations! I also recognise that my life would be quite different if you had not decided to continue with such determination. I remember very little about my first session, except getting my eyesight back and starting on the road to "normality". Mostly I remembered your phrase the day before, that I "had pushed you to your limits". I did wonder how one person and their small bundle of consciousness issues justified the risk; when you were able to work on such a large scale, opening people up to new ways of dealing with thoughts and conscious before they were out of control; and of course your work another work seen and unseen. Many thanks again. (ML-UK)
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I just wanted to say that I have read your current newsletter and was deeply moved by the experience that you went through, but can also say how amazing it really was that when we are working with the light especially in this moment, that source was able to show you and work with you to get you healed, truly wonderful that you are chosen as a lightworker and have much work to do to bring about the bright future. My mother in law died of cancer and we only found out the day before she died, but I felt really helpless that I could not help her as much as I would have liked too. Like yourself I started a life changing experience...I have always had to work alone and find things the hard way, but I believe that my decision is to bring an awareness of love and compassion and for people to begin to understand the way the world is going and to work with god and this is the reason that I see god helping me in so many ways. Love and take care. (N. -UK)
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