Chapter 5: Learning about Power

The second brain state, the emotional/territorial circuit or ego, is imprinted during the toddler stage, when we begin to stand, walk, and struggle for power within the family. Once activated, this circuit identifies the stimuli that automatically triggers territorial rules, emotional games, pecking order, and aggressive or submissive behavior.

This emotional/territorial circuit is primarily imprinted by the father figure and marks if our aggressive/submissive behavior will predominantly take one of four forms: Hostile Strength or the tyrant ("I give the orders here."); Friendly Strength or the good parent ("Have courage, it's safe out there."); Hostile Weakness or the paranoid ("Mommy, take me home."); Friendly Weakness or the dependent neurotic ("Please tell me what to do.").

The emotional challenges in my family taught me how to be strong and to survive, and how to protect myself. My parents married in 1942 and divorced soon after. My father, Harley, was a Staff Sergeant in the U.S. Army Air Force and had a rough, heroic vibration. He was a survivor. He would boldly say that he could outfight, out-screw, and out-drink anybody, anytime. He was extremely righteous and would always fight for the underdog. His birth name was Bragdon, but it was changed to Newman when his mother divorced and remarried. During the war, he was stationed in England where he was a radio operator in a B-29 bomber. He was in a plane crash and spent four months recovering. When my father came back from England, he remarried my mother and fathered me. I chose this man to be my father because he was fearless. He lived life passionately and ran a lot of emotional energy. He passed on to me the energetics that I needed to survive.

My parents divorced again when I was young, but my stepfather continued to model a tough, hero image during my teen years. He was in the US Army Airborne during WW II. His company was stationed on one of the Pacific Islands when his position was overrun by the Japanese, and he fought for weeks on a ridge. He was one of ten survivors out of his whole company.

My mother, Nita, was also powerful, smart, passionate, and strong willed. She grew up in Texas and moved to California as a teenager. Her example of power and focus helped me throughout my life.

I grew up with good protectors around me and observed how they made themselves powerful. I learned how to be strong, aggressive, and dominant, which later helped me in the corporate world. As I began my spiritual path, I discovered the difference between internal and external power. I found out what true strength really is.