by Ken Page and Nancy Nester
There are many interpretations of the term ‘Soul Mate’. Many of them do not apply to every experience of energetic souls, twin flames or other titles. For our definition of ‘Soul Mate’, we'd like to have you do the following exercise:
Draw two large equal circles - side by side on a piece of paper. Within one of those circles, draw three smaller circles. Do the same within the second circle. You might want to color each of those small circles a light color, such as yellow, blue, pink, mint green etc. Then, color the remaining area of each of the large circles a darker color.
Imagine that each of the three lighter-colored circles within the large circle on the right represent all those experiences for which you have unconditional love- all that you have created for yourself. The inner circles are what you have come to love within yourself and others. The darker part of that large circle represents those areas of yourself that still require examination, experience and learning. We can also call this space the eternal Void.
Now, do the same for the second circle - color it the same as your first circle. Imagine now that the circle on the left is another person. We will call that other person a ‘soul-mate’. Since the circle on the left is a mirror of the circle on the right, your ‘soul-mate’ reflects back to you everything that you have ever loved.
The right circle is your heart center projecting inward; the left circle is your soul-mate’s heart center which is you, projected outward - a reflection of your inward projection. You feel the same energetics inward with yourself as you feel from outside of yourself - with your soul-mate. The reason you feel that so clearly is your ‘soul-mate’ is an energetic reflection of everything you have loved and those connections you have already made with Source.
Have you ever wondered why 90% (or higher) of your ‘soul mates’ could not stay in relationship with you? As you look at the heart/soul centers, it becomes quite obvious. Since each large circle represents your own heart and soul center, together you could each move through the dark area on your mirrored circles in a faster way. The problem is, most people can’t let go of all the things they do not love. That often causes one of the mirror heart/soul centers (or soul-mates) to become fearful and scared. Consequently, one of the mirrors runs away from the intensity of the reflection of what each of you needs to experience, not just individually, but collectively. If each one of the heart/soul centers, ‘soul-mates’, could continue focusing on what each individually loves, consciously slows down (avoiding the feeling of wanting to go faster), and becomes more physical with themselves, that can allow an easier, and more constant exploration of new areas together - like stair-stepping together. You take one step, I help you up the other step. I take one step, you help me up the next step. Together, you gradually continue to open new areas for each other to explore - ones that were not comfortable in past relationships and in our relationship to our own creative self.
One of the greatest fears we often have is that we will get lost going outside of our ‘zone of comfort’. With a soul mate, you have a greater sense of security that there will be someone there for you - to catch you if you slip while reaching for your star; and also to rely on someone who can help you with present time. Some people will also call these personal relationships ‘twin-flames’. These words have become the romantic dream of many individuals looking for true love. A ‘soul mate’, or ‘twin flame’, when we make that connection, causes our inner circles to grow greater in size, filling more of the dark spaces in our own large circle, shrinking that space of void and allowing for greater opportunities to create from within our inner circles and our own heart/soul center.
When your soul mate, or your reflection of what you find comfortable within yourself leaves, the sadness of not being able to feel that energy or reflection from outside of yourself any longer, causes our inner self (circles) to retract, get smaller; thereby creating a greater dark space within our own heart/soul center (circle) - more of a void. This retraction within our own heart/soul center compounds, causing a continual inward spiral - closing off many areas of comfort or security, creating a feeling of spiritual loss which some call the Dark Night of the Soul. It has been expressed that this feels like a loss of our connection with Higher Self, closing off many of those areas which previous experience and learning had opened or exposed to our own God-Self.
That’s why Love is a key to making your connection to your own Higher Self. That’s the very reason why we have said that the word 'love' is the most challenging word and feeling. Basically, how do we love? The experience of love is different for each one of us. We can only know how to love based upon the way in which we have loved or been loved in our past experiences. Nothing more, yet nothing less. That, coupled with the factor of ‘What you trust is not what you like, it’s what you have survived’, makes us constantly compare everything and everyone to some thing or some emotion that does not instinctively feel right within our own heart. It is not until we stop using or requiring other people to define us, that we will ever move out of these old paradigms. The more we love ourselves, the bigger the eternal circles become, bringing the full reflection of the whole circle. This in turn changes our personal world as well as the world around us.
Think of the dark part that we have not yet explored, examined or experienced as the Void that mirrors back to us everyone and everything we judge or do not love. The more judgment we have, the more we are upset or angry, the easier it is for us to spiral into this Void and be lost in that energy. The Void will act as a reflection of whatever we feel, magnified 100 or 1000 times each emotion. We will not get out of that vibration, or energetic Void until we have love and compassion for all creation.
When both you and your soul mate match what you love internally and outwardly, a beautiful and unique occurrence happens. That experience can support you physically in a way that removes those previous fears of getting lost so that together, you can feel free to explore the unknown.
At the point in time when your inner circles begin to occupy more than 60% of your heart/soul center, you can then never again go backwards or settle for anyone or anything that would reflect less than your own connection to your Higher Self. The more you become a reflection of your Soul and God-Self, the less you can exist in the past. It would no longer require a ‘soul-mate’ to reflect you back to yourself.
That’s why we believe so many of us are looking for extended family, or communities that might reflect ourselves back in a way than may feel safer than the way in which we are with a lover or a 'soul-mate'. We do not believe that there is only one‘soul-mate’for any of us. All of us are soul-mates of each other and we can only recognize another 'soul-mate' when we have each internally and outwardly had experiences that allow our heart/soul centers to become mirrors of ourselves. As we allow our heart to more fully open, and allow our soul and heart to become One, it becomes easier for others that are on the same parallel path to see and feel that mirror reflection and become our 'soul-mate'.